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The Birth of Cheeky Baby

On March 10, 2010, I went into labor with Addison, being technically one week past her “due” date of March 3rd. The day was pretty normal, just me and Haden hanging out, while Daddy was at work. We did a lot of dancing that day. In the afternoon we laid down to watch a movie and take a nap. I woke up from my nap at 4:20 in the afternoon, having a contraction. I didn’t really pay it much mind, because I’d been having contractions here and there for the past few weeks. I decided to get up to start working on making dinner, which was a big pot of homemade minestrone soup. I turned back on the radio. Throughout making dinner the contractions kept coming, what seemed like about every five minutes or so. I never did time any of them though, so I’m just guessing. I just danced during them, trying not to pay to much attention, because I wasn’t really sure I was in labor. At some point Haden woke up, and was hanging out with me while I cooked. Then, Michael called to say he was on his way home. I told him that I didn’t want him to get too excited, but I thought that I might be in labor. Michael got home at around six, and we all sat down to eat. They were still coming what seemed like every few minutes; Michael was sure I was in labor, but I still wasn’t convinced. He decided to go to the chiropractor as he had originally planned, so he left, I started cleaning up from dinner, and straightening up the house. At some point after he left, contractions started to get stronger. I decided to call him to see how much longer he would be, I wanted him home with me. He told me I should call my mom to come pick Haden up, which I decided to do even though at that point I still had my doubts about it being the real deal. After that I didn’t really like doing anything else around the house. I didn’t want to be upright during them anymore, so every time I had one, I would get down onto my hands and knees. Haden kept trying to comfort me during them by giving me hugs, and telling me it was going to be okay. He’s such a sweet boy, and a great doula! Michael got back,... read more

The Birth of Doodle Boy

During my pregnancy with Haden, I knew very little about childbirth, and watched just enough Baby Story to keep me terrified of the process. I, like many women, gave myself completely over to my doctor, believing that anything that I really needed to know, my doctor would tell me. It has been three years since his birth, so I know of the finer details will be lost here, but I wanted to try my best to write down the things I do remember. On September 22, 2006, after a late night trek to a gas station, and a king size Snickers for my belly, my husband and I laid down in the bed to get some sleep. Around midnight, I started having noticeable contractions. We stayed in bed timing the contractions from the very first one, to be sure I was actually in labor, and did this for an hour. During that time I started having bloody show. Contractions were coming every five to six minutes, and had been like that since I first noticed them. Since my doctor had said we should go to the hospital when contraction were coming every five minutes for an hour, we got right out of bed to get ready for the hospital. I did some cleaning around the house because I wanted to come home to prettiness, and Michael ran around trying to make sure we had everything packed. Contractions were very mild at the time, pretty much like strong period cramps, but nothing as bad as I had felt before; during my high school years, I had a period of time where I suffered very severe period cramps that would sometimes cause vomiting. I was okay with taking my time leaving, but Michael really wanted to leave, so we headed out to the hospital at three in the morning. The ride was slightly uncomfortable, and I was glad to get out of the car. We went inside, and sat down at the admissions desk to take care of things there. Then, we headed upstairs, and went into triage, where I was asked a series of annoying questions, then had my cervix checked where I was found to be at 2 cm. This might have been more exciting if I hadn’t already been two cm for the past two weeks. They would not admit me, so I was told to go walk the halls for an hour, and then come back to... read more

These Dog Days are Over

I admit it. I’ve lost it. “The Spark” that I thought I had back, lasted all of a minute, and then it was gone again. I actually spent my afternoon packing up all of my “birthy” things, teachings aids, curriculum, continuing education notebooks, and videos. Now it is all nicely stacked up in my storage closet, awaiting the day when I will decide what to do with it all. I have been desperately clinging to my old self, the one that lived and breathed birth. I knew what I wanted, and where I was going. I had all these goals, accomplishments, but most importantly I felt like I had a purpose. I know that what you do doesn’t define who you are, and I can say that to myself, and believe it. It is a logical statement. Yet, I can’t help the way that I feel, and how I feel is… Completely lost. I see the enthusiasm in some of my friends that are just starting on their path, and I see myself in them. I miss that feeling, the excitement of it, and I envy them for it. Everything that I have been struggling with has left me feeling disconnected from my old life, and I am not quite sure how to bridge the gap, or even if I should. When I decided to write my essay “Numbed Bliss or Agonizing Pain?” I hoped that it might jazz me up, make me feel something, but it really only solidified my overall feelings as of late. I don’t know where I am going, or what it is that I want to do. My sense of control is feeling seriously screwed with, and anyone who knows me, knows that this is a big problem for me. I have been floundering in my attempts to try and pull myself out of this. What I really need is to reach a place of acceptance with myself. To accept that I am still a growing person, and let myself be okay with that fact. I need to not be afraid of all the unknowns in front of me, and to allow myself to be patient, because there is no need to hurry ahead. It is time to move forward, whatever that means. I *think* that for me it means, trying to enjoy all the stuff in the middle, instead of trying to skip to the end. So, I guess the point of this blog is that I... read more

Numbed Bliss or Agonizing Pain?

My fourth essay for class, a compare and contrast essay. I made an 88 on it. 🙂   Numbed Bliss or Agonizing Pain? Anyone who enjoys watching television for entertainment has likely viewed a dramatic birth scene, like the one in the movie, Nine Months. Julianne Moore’s character, Rebecca, is about to have dinner when her water suddenly breaks in the restaurant, “Honey! My water broke!” Panic then ensues; there is the rush to the hospital, in which her husband Samuel, played by Hugh Grant, is driving extremely recklessly. Rebecca is already having strong contractions, in severe pain, and stressed out. She is rushed on a gurney through the hospital, screaming in agony, and in agitation at anyone who talks to her. Samuel yells at the doctor, “Can’t you give her something for the pain??!!” Rebecca never does get her much wanted epidural (Columbus). Granted, the scene is a mixture of drama and hilarity, but this is a reflection of our birth culture, and is fundamentally a contributing factor to our opinions and perceptions surrounding birth. However, there are more points to consider in regards to pain management for labor and birth; it is not just a simplistic choice between numbed bliss and agonizing pain. We live in a society where it is very beneficial as consumers to investigate the options available to us. When it comes to deciding what you want during your birth, it is important to know the positives and the negatives of the choices that you have. Then, with all the information available, you can make the best choices suited for you. This is also what is known as informed consent. Natural birth, for my purpose, is defined as birth without pain medication being used during the course of labor. There are numerous ways for women laboring without medication to gain relief from their contractions. These techniques can include massages, movement, positional changes, and being submerged in water. Simple things like dim lighting, music, focused breathing, and even prayer can be comforting (Kitzinger 189-225). Possibly the most effective comfort measure a woman can have during a natural labor is being surrounded by supportive people. A doula, which is a labor support person that is trained to help laboring women on a physical and emotional level, is a terrific addition to a woman’s support team; regardless if they are having a medicated birth or an unmedicated one. Other than the obvious benefits of being able to... read more

Tit Terrorists?

Breastfeeding Nazis. Being called superior, condescending and judgmental. These are just some of the not-so-nice things I have heard said about lactavists. I have counted myself amongst lactavists for the past 4 years. In the beginning, my first thoughts when hearing those kinds of insults about lactavists were defensive ones. People that would say that about lacatvists obviously don’t understand. They don’t understand that we are coming from a place of passion! If they really knew what I KNOW then they would feel the same way I feel. Blame it on ignorance, because we all know that if every woman were as smart as me, then they would obviously think exactly the way I do. (Sarcasm) I say that sarcastically now, but there was a time where I really felt that way. Some people might assume that those kinds of remarks would come only from women that are hard-core promoters of formula feeding. The mothers who formula fed all their children and firmly believe that there is no notable differences between the two. I have been noticing though, that that doesn’t alway seem to be the case. There are many women that support breastfeeding, have breastfed their children or are currently breastfeeding their children, that don’t have positive feelings towards lactavists and wouldn’t want to count themselves amongst them. Why is that? Recent events have shown an upsurge on Facebook amongst  lacatavists , posting about the horrors of formula feeding. I really have to take a moment to thank a friend of mine. Reading her blog this past year about her trials, her thoughts & feelings about a breastfeeding relationship she had originally wanted and ended up not having and the emotions she has felt through it all, has gone a long way to opening my eyes about the WAY we talk about breastfeeding and the profound effect that it can have on all different types of women.   These ads were created to demand honesty in formula advertising. Who is the demand being made to though? Are formula companies seeing these ads? Or just thousands of mothers across the internet? False advertising isn’t a new idea. Check out most items on any given shelf in your grocery store and you will see some. If we want there to be more honesty in advertising, is this the most productive way to try and achieve it? Is this about educating mothers? Pretend for a second that you are a mother who doesn’t... read more

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