Maybe it is because of all the freakin’ rain this week. Or maybe it’s because I am a little hormonal right now, due to the only thing that is unfortunate about being a woman. 😉 Either way, I am in a totally unhappy place inside my head.
I am struggling with all these negative emotions, which range from feeling stressed & overwhelmed to bored & lazy. Listless even. Yet, I can’t quite pinpoint the exact reason I am feeling any of them? Maybe it is something about summer. Last summer was not a good place for me either.
Haden seems right on the cusp of being in another not-so-great phase, and I can’t help but doubt my abilities as a mom, as usual. Every time we start fighting more, I start feeling like I have done something to perpetually ruin him. That boy has serious mouth on him, and why wouldn’t he? I have a serious mouth on me. Sometimes being a mom sucks.
I was feeling totally confident about the upcoming school year, happy with how far *I* have come in the past year, and all of a sudden I see myself wanting to slip back into old patterns.
Today, Haden told me that he doesn’t want to do yoga anymore, and it almost made me wanna cry. Which is just STUPID. Fuck this. It is Friday and I think I need a drink.