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One Bad Page

Fear and Writing

Inside My Brain…

I AM my own worst enemy when it comes to writing, staring at this screen as if I have nothing of value to say – my brain completely frozen. I’m 100% convinced I’ve never had an intelligent thought in my life. I’ll just type whatever I’m thinking for a while. At some point, it will turn into something on the actual topic I’m supposed to be writing about…

Writing wasn’t always this hard, and I wasn’t always this hard on myself. Weren’t my 30s supposed to be a time of self-ownership, and not giving any fucks what other people think about me??? Instead, all I do these days is worry about what people think about me. I think poorly about myself, and then it feels as if the rest of the world perceives me through the same lens I’m viewing myself. Honestly, it’s a sucky ass way to live.

I may not be cut out for writing a blog this long, especially one this long, and on homeschooling to boot. Homeschooling isn’t a topic I write about much these days – that could be part of the problem. I’m trying to fit myself into a space that I don’t belong (as usual!), and then I feel frustrated when it doesn’t go smoothly or feel right for me.

Here’s the thing. Maybe I don’t want to write about homeschooling ALL the time, but I sure as shit have what it takes to write a 1200 word article on a topic related to it, and I’m FUCKING getting this done. End of story.

Guess what? I did get it done.

Using Stories to Inspire Service ProjectsBOOM —> Using Stories to Inspire Service Projects was published by Secular, Eclectic, Academic Homeschoolers the week after Thanksgiving, and it turned out to be a resourceful, little piece that I mostly enjoyed writing. That one bad page of negative self-talk turned into something of sustenance. I tell the kids I coach in writing this same thing all the time – you just have to start writing and see what it turns into. Why is it so hard to take my own advice?

If you ever daydream about doing service projects as a family and want ideas on how you can use literature to create more meaning in those that you endeavor to do, then you might just want to check it out.

An excerpt:

“Nurturing empathy in children can be a lofty goal that requires more intention than we sometimes realize is necessary.

Life is beautiful and full of joy, but at the same time, the world can be a dark and heavy space, and the instinct for self-preservation and the development of fears can be more pervasive than we realize. There is a great importance in guiding children in their ability to look at the world from the perspective of others, to understand that the way we treat people and the choices we make, what our government does, how businesses behave, how we treat the earth and so much more ALL HAVE AN IMPACT.Homeless Care Packages

Sociologists refer to this as the development of sociological imagination, which is the awareness of the relationship that exists between personal actions and our greater society.

What better way to bridge the gap between the realities of our children’s lives to the experiences of others than through storytelling?”

 

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